NVC(Non Violent Communication)

We all want a peaceful life
But some things may be a knife
Little battles in the family
Over lost sox or kid like insensibly
We fight very sentimentally
At least see the reason,
What happened to our mentality?
Small things not worth our attention
Becomes reason for relation anhiliation.

So what is the solution
How to avoid
Unnecessary confrontation
What we need in our life
Is a simple correction
For the sake of your bonds
Opt for Non Violent Communication

A simple technique inspired form Gandhi,
Is the art of avoiding everyday frustration,
Caused by non important reasons,
But for our happiness become a adulteration.

The technique based on the principle of empathy,
Consists of 4 steps, only a little lengthy,
But has its adbantage and no penalty.

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First, Observe
What is troubling you,
What act of other,
Troubles you so much,
That you wanna curse his mother,
But wait, don’t fall for the bait,
Shut your mouth before too late,
Rather proceed to second state.

Your feelings,
Towards this dealing,
Analyse type emotions,
Anger, despair or frustration
That arise in you
By seeing the other’s action,
What emotions you get,
Are usually the mirror,
Of your behaviour outlet.

Next,
Understand the need,
By which your feelings lead,
Every human emotion,
Is the result of a certain need,
Weather attention, hunger,
Love, sex or even greed.
We get angry or frustrated
When some of them,
We cannot meet.
If you know your needs and expectations,
You may also understand other’s reason
Behind his or hers actions.

Last step in most important,
Once you understand your distress,
And expectations from others
Convey to them as a simple request.
Be polite and understating,
Rather then, harsh and demanding.
Keep your ego on a side,
And explain your need with a calm mind,
So that they can also find,
What actions of theirs, do you mind.

The steps are simple,
Even are just common sense,
But anger can blog your senses do much,
You view everything, with the hatred lens.

Practice this checklist,
Observe, feelings, need and request
To bind you resolution in a way
In which terms of both are best.
Do not let your negetavity win,
This, is your final test.
At last, just All d best😊😊
      
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For more info on NYC vist this wikipedia pagehttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nonviolent_Communication

A smile worth thousand night sleeps

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Woke up in the morning
Sleeping is so boring
I want to play
I want to play

Mama mama! where are you
Papa Papa found you
Come to me , come to me
Today show me something new

Dadi dadu play with me
I want to play now only
Later drink  your tea

Pick me in your lap
Sing a song
Or do I amplify my cry
And your ear goes
Bong bong bong!

Mama picked me up
Rocking in her lap
Sang a lullaby
Like a sweet syrup

In mama’s lap, at this moment
I am sooo happy
And feeling very sleepy

Wait a min

Why mamma putting me to sleep,
When I want to play, sing and leap,
Why Papa saying to count the sheep?

Isn’t it  already the morning
Why everyone sleepily frowning?
Oh o! Maybe I woke up early
Not morning, it is 12 thirty

Oopsy dupsy!
I woke everyone at midnight,
When should be sleeping tight,
If mama is angry, she has the right,
But I know this will not lead to fight.

Mamma loved me so much,
She will never scold me
For a thing as such

I know Mamma ,
I give you lots of trouble
But on seeing me
Your anger pops like a bubble

I know getting a mom like you
Is the destiny of just a lucky few
To compensate for this trouble
I will give this smile just for….you
***********

This poem is dedicated to Manu Bhaiya, Kiti Bhabhi and of course the cute gift they have given us – Maahir(their 3 month old baby)

     I request all readers to pray for Maahir’s long life, good health , brilliant mind and for this precious smile to remain forever.

On my 20th birthday- best gift trust of papa

ON YOUR TWENTIETH BIRTHDAY

Your birthday, my dear son, recalls every time,

Every odd turns to, dear Piyush, a happy pastime.

Difficulties always stand in our path, not to melt,

Not to break our will our spirit but to rise sublime.

You took normal birth, but in operation theatre,

A sign to reduce toughest exigency at a low ebb.

Higher the mountain higher to be our aspiration,

To gain the summit, keep rise, to cross the web.

Woeful plight of gone year faced at with brave,

Made you stronger against all toughs of life ever.

Keep the spirit, shine like the polar star, be happy,

Your life blossom like roses, fructify flavour.
may
Many many happy returns of the day, Oh! dear,

Live for thousands years ever with beaming face.

A computer lover, a blogger, always creative guy,

Wish you all the felicities of life with God’s grace.

                  
                      by : Prakash Chander Gupta

                            (My father)

    A beautiful poem written for me by my papa, the person I love the most, the person I trust the most.
   It is the my best birthday gift. Even best than my Xperia Z1.
   Why because it does Papa’s changing view of me. He is now not looking at a child who went in his lap every time he has some problem. Nor a teenager who needs his guidance at every corner. He sees a mature adult who can take his own responsibility. Who knows what he needs to do? Who is not his burden rather his strength?
      I owe papa very much. He just not took care of my financial needs. Rather he is my flashlight who guided. He is the one who helped me reasons my love for pretty programming. He is the one who encouraged me for writing.( my english till 3rd was really weak. I now understand the worth of those hours of translation and grammer lessons).
      Form big things to small things like showing me bus routes to collage to helping me in studying Maths(he has not studied the collage level maths. He studied now just for me).
     Now, when I am old enough I am keen on returning something. I have realised the best thing I can return him is pride and happiness that a parent get on setting his/her child winning in life. Satisfaction that his parenting was right.
      This is one of the main reason I started blogging. I loved the emotions on his face when I told his I have reached more than 25 followers (lots of thanks to all my followers).
    Well, it is just a beginning. I still have to learn a lot to be able to take all his responsibilities. Thankfully, I have papa and that is more than enough.
     Thank typo for reading. Always remember what type parents means to you and what you mean to them.

Papa – a simple life of great endeavor

       
      

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My family is quiet well off from the blessings of Krishna and of course Papa. We have everything we need and luxuries want. Just 2 hrs ago I was watching a movie on our Bravia Led tv. Just now I was playing Counter Strike condition zero on my DELL laptop. Now I am writing this blog on my Xperia Z1 smartphone.
         Papa has provided us with everything we need. From our basic needs to be costly luxuries.  But there was a time when my family was not so well off(much before I was born).
          Around half a century ago, in 1957 papa was born to an extremely poor mother (Amma – my grandmother).  It was the time only 9 years after the India Independence.  The circumstances of the country was not good. The economy is its in its initial stages. There is large scale unemployment.
         My grandfather owned a small tea shop in the small town of Arki situated in the country side of Himachal Pradesh. He was second born to Amma. Four followed in coming years. With the 5 siblings my father was grown up in the small town.  Despite the poverty my grandmother (Amma) imparted him best possible moral teachings possible.  Though she had only studied till 5th class,  she believes that education is as important as 2 time meals. Despite her poverty she admitted all her six children in the local primary school.(which will prove to be her greatest gift for the entire family).  Her moral teachings and unconditional love will not go to unawarded.
        My father joined school in 1963. Immediately he proved his talents and devotion to study in all subjects especially maths. He wanted to support his mother in every way. Soon he started gaining scholarships after scholarships (I have to hide my face when compared to him).  He was never dependent on others for his education. 
      It was not that easy. Lots of ups and downs came in his life. My father knows that he would also have to support family in some way.
There were many times they couldn’t able to afford 2 square meals. My father along with tau(his bigger brother) and Amma had to cut their stomach to be able to feed the younger once.
         My grandfather was not so good.  What I can say? He did not care for his family when they needed him the most. The income from the small tea shop was usually spent on his cigarettes or his love for  non veg. He is not in this world now. But memories he have left behind are not happy once.
       With such responsibility I don’t think any child would feel like continuing his education. But my father don’t let this stop him. Even the desire to change the circumstances of the family become the greatest motivation in his life.
      There were some very depressing time. Like one time he needed to purchase a practical file for his school. But grandmother has no money for it. He was told to submit the file next day only. He purchased 1 kilo of jaggery for 20 paise(1 rupee = 100 paise). He spent entire evening cutting it in shape of toffees and wrapped them in pieces of newspaper.  He went to market to sell them for 3 paise each. Till the dead at night he sold them all an earned around 45 paise. That was his first income.  He finally buied file for 35 praise and gave the rest to his mother.
        Such dedication I don’t think is possible for me.  I shall prefer not going to school the next day. But my father thinks entirely different. He believes that not submitting work on time will raise questions to your dedication. 
        When Papa reached 8th class the family shifted to a bigger town Bilaspur. My grandfather rented a small general store. Usually my father had to help in the store after the break. He had to usually miss periods after the break.( i always feel a little guilt when I bunk for hanging out with my friends). Despite of teacher’s complaints, my father study with full heart. Because of his hard work, he stood 4th in Himachal Board Exam of 8th class.
       When he passed matrix (10th class), an important decision was waiting for him. In India after 10th students have to choose from 3 disciplines – Humanities, Science Or Commerce.  My father wanted to take commerce. It was his dream.  But at that time Commerce was not offered at his school and of course he can’t afford to go in some big city.  So killing his dream he opted for Humanities and pursues BA (Bachelor Of Arts) in political science. That was hard time for him.  He always wanted to pursue Commerce. But he studied whatever he got with full day devotion for his family and topped in second year of college.
        2 months after the results he got the call that will change his life forever.  He was selected for a job in the government. He was really happy at that time. Completing his education he immediately joined the job and family shifted to Delhi.
         In the free time,  he decided to pursue his dream. He started studying commerce.  Without any tuition or coaching he passed the entrance test for ICWA ( bachelor degree in commerce) in the first attempt. (My sister has passed this test in 3rd attempt even after getting the best coaching available).
      On completing ICWA, he was promoted to the rank of the officer and everything changed forever.
      It may feel like a made up story. But it is the true story of my father. 25 years later he have 2 children (me and my elder sister). 
        Father has given us a life full of love,  dreams and luxuries.  He has tried to give us everything that he can’t get in his childhood. May be he is not Steve Jobs or Mahatma Gandhi but to us he is a man born for greatness and source of endless inspiration.
       Thank you papa for everything.  I promise one day you will be proud of me as I am proud of you.(it is one of my main inspiration for started blogging).
    Papa Achche(papa is best)
   Many many thanks to you also for reading. Enjoy your life but never forget what your parents have done for you.
      Have a blissful life
    

Dilemma in wisdom -Gandhi’s 3 wise monkeys

       From our childhood we are told to always take the right path . Never to think evil – never to see evil, never to say evil, never to hear evil.

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         Gandhi’s 3 wide monkeys
    (Though a 4th should be added-
              Never to post evil )

   But I don’t think that I is really as easy as it seems. Even this is not entirely practically possible. Let us say,  we promise not to see evil, not speak evil, not hear evil. But how do we know of something is evil of we just close our senses top it.
    We don’t really taste or touch or smell something to know it is evil. Do we? If we just close our eyes, ears and mouth how do we can recognize something around us is evil. If we can’t recognize that something is evil than how do can we protect our self and people stupid us from it. Even
     Let us take a real life example. Suppose, you are walking around a park. You see some men are molesting a girl at a corner of the park. She looks towards you with pleading eyes. She called up you for help. Now you have a choice in this situation.
      Remember your duties of a good citizen and rush to help her. Or close your eyes close your ears and leave. Close your mouth and don’t tell anyone. Forget it ever happened.
    What do you think is the right thing to do? The first option or the later . What you think if Gandhi ji was at your place has done. Of course he had rush to immediately to help the girl. Hasn’t he ? (After all he is Gandhi for some reason) .
     So the wisdom of three wide monkeys is wrong? Are we fools to follow it? Are we giving wrong teachings to our kids? If you think do I am story I completely disagree with you?
     The above interpretation is completely wrong of we see it in context of present time.
     Everything have to evolve south time. If someone or something refused to evolve it will be deleted to nothing ? Let us not let gandhi’s dear monkeys die.
      Probably at the time of gandhi it was enough to hide evil from children to save then from evil. But the world has changed? Today a child has thousands sources to know about them.
      If you do not discuss with your children the evils of society , this will only increase their curiosity. They will consider the other sources which usually do not show the true face of evil .They will fall for its allure and will unable to see the negative, the bad things behind it. They will be unable to see the true face of evil.
Children secret watching porn is a very common example of this.
      The mission of the 3 wise monkeys is not to teach hide the evil or how to ignore the evil. That is evil itself . Their true mission is to show the people the true face of evil , to discourage them not to follow it.
    When the first money closes his mouth, he is not telling to remain silent when evil is happening before you. Rather he is telling you to not to join yourself. It is telling not to say ill words that can hurt someone.
    When second and third monkeys closes their eyes and ears. They are not telling you to close your eyes and ears in front of evil happening before you. They are rather telling you not just see what is happening . They are telling you to refuse to accept that. Refuse to accept that this can happen in society we live in. Refuse to accept that you have to hear or see such evil.
       Correct interpretation is more important than meaning.
       Nerd of the time is to accept the reality of today’s world and to understand the true wisdom of three wide monkeys.
     The end goal is same but the means have to be changed. Hiding evil will not gonna work. Children should be taught about the evil ,its true true nature and its bad affected from the right sources.
     That is it. The article is finished but if you are a patent. Your work starts here.
    Thank you for reading.